Knife and Fork Nachos

Once a year, people claim it’s Opposite Day.

Normally that just means someone says the sky is green and we all move on with our lives. But I started wondering what it would actually mean for nachos.

The obvious answer is simple.

You don’t eat them with your hands.

You eat them with a knife and fork.

Picture it: a plate of nachos placed in front of you like a serious entrée. Utensils on both sides. Napkin folded carefully.

No grabbing chips.

Just quiet, civilized cutting.

The problem becomes clear immediately.

A fork cannot negotiate with nachos.

It breaks the chips.
It pushes the toppings away.
It separates things that were clearly meant to stay together.

After a few minutes the plate stops resembling nachos at all.

It’s just a scattered arrangement of ingredients that used to be nachos.

Which, now that I think about it, might actually be the opposite of nachos.